The Four Needs That Cannot Be Satisfied
Everyone on this planet has four fundamental desires that can never be completely satisfied. Whether it's your mom, the minimalist person in your life, or even a person with amazing wealth - these four needs always remain. Giving someone a gift that ties into one of these four needs will never go unappreciated.
Offering Solutions To Problems
People are hard to please, so why not take away a source of annoyance or a dreaded struggle instead of trying to bring joy with a gift? Here are some ideas to help you come up with a solution to a problem faced by the gift recipient:
Too many responsibilities: Gift certificates for babysitting or pet sitting services.
Annoyances with everyday life: Hire a handyman to take care of all the little things like squeaky doors, clogged sinks, and scratched walls that are always being ignored.
Broken or outdated technology: Encourage them to upgrade with a fast charger, a computer clean-up, a cracked screen replacement, or a new battery for their phone.
Tedious, unrewarding chores: Get them help with cleaning services, a laundry delivery service, or home-delivered, healthy meals.
Feeling guilty about wasting resources: Replace saran wrap with beeswax wraps, Ziplocs with Stasher bags, and parchment paper with Silpat baking mats.
Lack of time or feeling like there are not enough hours in the day: Offer Uber rides so they can get to a destination without wasting time searching for a parking spot and using the ride for responding to emails.
Loneliness: Organize a get-together or hire a dating coach.
When you are trying to solve a problem, keep these two points in mind:
Do not try to solve a problem that the recipient does not want or is not aware of.
Do not get deodorant for a friend with bad body odor without asking first, do not get a fat loss coach for your wife without her permission, and do not assume that someone needs a personal stylist or fashion consultant.
Do not give your recipient a new problem.
If you are getting them a cooking class, a handyman, or a trip, take the time to arrange a date and time that is likely to work with the recipient's schedule. This way, they do not have the additional burden of having to figure out when they will use the gift. It will make it more valuable if they have something to look forward to. Avoid giving gift cards to places they do not usually pass by. This will only lead to them forgetting about it and feeling guilty when they eventually do remember it.
A Present that Satisfies their Needs
Getting someone the perfect gift can be difficult. Behavioral economist Dan Ariely has said that a great gift is something the recipient wants but is too guilty to buy themselves. The easiest way to guarantee fulfillment of their desires is to get them what they asked for. While it may seem dull, giving them what they want is the most foolproof way to make them happy and improve your relationship.
Sometimes, the person you’re buying the gift for may not know what they want or they tell you they already have everything they need. If that’s the case, you can explore one of their three possible insatiable needs. Ask yourself questions like: “If I were sitting on Santa’s lap and had to give him a request, what would it be?” or “What goals, projects, or plans do they have ahead?”
A Gift that Creates Meaning
When it comes to presenting a meaningful gift, consider what will be most sentimental. Studies display that people prize items more if they are gifted than if they buy it themselves. This is because the novelty of an item eventually wears off, but the sentimentality does not.
To make your gift more personal, think of ways to individualize it. Many people have favorite gifts that they begged and pleaded for, so pick something they’ve always wanted. Additionally, you can capture a moment and make it a memory with something personal like a rap video or a written letter.
To attach a story to the item, get creative with the wrapping and delivery. For example, if you’re giving them a consumable, arrange a blind taste test where they can learn something while having an excuse to be social. That way, they can enjoy the high-quality product without feeling guilty and all future purchases or tries will have a story behind it, enriching the experience.
An Excellent Gift Can Help The Receiver Become More Efficient
In her book, Reinforcements: How to Get People to Help You, Heidi Grant presents a compelling thought:
“More than pleasure or avoiding pain, people seek to be effective.”
When searching for a great gift for someone, think:
How can I aid them in becoming more effective in their work?
An example to follow: During the Christmas season a few years ago, Kim acquired classes for us with a massage therapist to teach us how to give each other better massages. And for Kim's birthday, I arranged for her to have a session with a calisthenics expert to enhance her skill level and offer her new exercise ideas.
This triple threat of a gift is perfect because:
It is something to anticipate.
It can be a social occasion.
It is a present that continues to give by making the receiver more capable.
What if hiring an expert is too costly?
Consider inquiring what they like to do to become more effective in their tasks, and purchase one of those things.
What if you can't find an expert?
Think of something that will help them in their everyday life, something like the greatest nail clippers or an incredible pen. Kim is a fan of the ones from Muji.
You can also add a personal touch to the item.
This last tip is tied to the fourth insatiable need.
Ultimate, Guaranteed Advice
I'm positive this tip will be successful due to the fact you took the time to find this post, and read through all of my babbling about the four insatiable wants:
Desires fulfilled
Fewer problems
Increased effectiveness
More meaning
Your thoughtfulness is remarkable!
Nevertheless, thoughtfulness isn't enough to guarantee gift-giving success. To paraphrase the words of behavioral scientist Nick Epley - the giver values the thought that's gone into a present. But the receiver only sees the gift.
To make sure that happens, do this:
Inform them of all the thought you put into the gift!
Let your fortunate giftee know, that you even went so far as to read blog posts focused on making them happy and showing how much you treasure your relationship.
So even if your gift doesn't work out, they will still feel special.
And who knows?
If your recipient is as thoughtful as you, they’ll be encouraged to put some extra effort into their next gift to you, which should make you very happy and bring you two even closer together.
